Ah, Miami… the magical Spanish speaking tip of the Florida peninsula that doesn’t quite feel like you’re in the United States anymore. Since the pandemic, I have been back and forth to Miami numerous times. Mostly for work, but what I can tell you is that between the balmy palms, warm ocean breeze, and the worry-free Latino attitude are just what you need when you can’t take another day of the cold harsh year of 2020 anymore. During this awful time of COVID, I have found two of the best hotels according to my gypset taste, that are still open and won’t disappoint. Here is my personal favorite when deciding where to stay for your magical Miami getaway. My honest, unpaid review of The Standard Spa Hotel Miami beach.
The Standard Hotel and Spa Miami Beach
Location and Amenities
So, if you are from NYC or somewhere else cool then you already know of the Standard Hotel. They are a trendy hotel chain that always ensures pretty people, hip decor, and a good party scene. The one in Miami is exceptional. It’s focused on the spa and wellness culture and most importantly, it is NOT on the beach. It’s on the bayside (sunset side) of Miami beach. Isolated by itself is a plus or minus depending on who you ask. The positives to this are that you are pretty much staying here to be away from the “Miami club scene” and most people who end up staying here really never leave the hotel for more than a trip to the store.
The rooms are all motel-like with an outdoor private entrance and the downstairs garden rooms have a private terrace with (an upgraded) outdoor bathtub. There is a huge common garden area in the middle of the grounds surrounded by jungle looking palm trees with hammocks to lounge in as well as a nighttime fire pit to drink around and make new friends or simply sit in silence and chill. The infinity pool on the bay is the top seller for me which includes a waterfall jacuzzi and ice-cold plunge pool. If you happen to be hungover this is the best possible cure that I could ever advise. Dipping from ice cold to smoking hot water will shock your body into thinking you want to drink again by 4 pm.
Positives
The staff is pretty nice depending on how you approach them. Compliments go far amongst young gay Latinos, FYI. If you get them on your side they will feel like your new best friends that you barely even know and hook you up with whatever you need.
The biggest plus I can tell you is that unlike all other hotel pools, this one never closes. That’s right. You can swim naked if you’d like and dip yourself to death in the hot tub till the sun comes up and you realize you’re naked in public. No one will tell you “the pool is closed at 8 pm miss” in an annoying bitchy voice.
As for dining, the Lido Bar and grill is beautiful and just next to the pool on a deck facing the bay. Great drinks, good food, and it’s right there which goes back to the point of never having to leave the property (aka, not putting shoes on, ever.) Other people from Miami will come to you. Good night spot for locals as well as guests.
The bohemian style exudes here and it feels like a very different world to the typical bling ring of South beach we are all used to. You can be barefoot, without makeup, and topless while roaming around like you own the place and no one will ever bat an eye (unless they like you).
Negatives
On a scale of 1-10, I rate this hotel an 8. They lose 2 points for making me wait till 4 pm to check-in and the fact that they don’t have fish tacos on the menu. Meat tacos but no fish. Stupid. Also, the coffee bar only carries oat and soy milk. Who the fuck drinks soy milk in 2020. Who? It’s the little things that one remembers.
The one big negative I need to point out is that due to the cute patios separated by cloth sheets and walls made of something thinner than paper, you can hear everything from your fellow Standard guests. On the weekends if you are here for a spa more than a fiesta, this is incredibly annoying. LWTip: to not be a disrespectful douche, you could simply party at the pool or garden (and refrain from incredibly loud sex) instead of waking up your neighbors at 3 am… Be cool. Spread the word.
Next up and 2nd choice to compare…
SLS Hotel Miami Beach
It’s hard to find experienced people on this topic, but you seem like you know what you’re talking about! Thanks
An impressive share! I’ve just forwarded this onto a co-worker who had been conducting a little homework on this. And he actually ordered me lunch due to the fact that I discovered it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thanks for the meal!! But yeah, thanks for spending time to discuss this topic here on your web page.
I really liked the review of Standard Miami. I have lived and worked in Asia for 25 years and have experienced it all. Again and again. We have travelled everywhere. I am in Miami next month and a stay at the Standard was suggested by a trusted friend. Your review has allowed me to set my expectations. It’s always good going in with somewhat of a heads up. My gf and I should be quite comfortable there. Thanks again. You have a great blog.
Nice read, I just passed this onto a friend who was doing a little research on that. And he just bought me lunch since I found it for him smile So let me rephrase that: Thanks for lunch!
Hello my friend! I want to say that this post is awesome, nice written and include almost all important infos. I抎 like to see more posts like this.